So I went to the store and nearly choked on a Wheaties box,wowser. Then I kicked a glazed ham, these things happen. An old man punched my gizzard and I thought Wow am I lucky. Two Canadian jockstrap salesmen carried me to my car (saints in my book). Then the smell of failure hit and I fell out the door while driving. They don’t make cars like they once did, let me tell ya. So as I was laying on the ground in some dog filth I thought man I only broke 3 ribs.
Then I crawled over to the hot dog stand and grabbed some 🍱 While I stood there covered in manure and blood I thought Boy am I blessed. It’s hard to be humble when you have it this good. I know you’re envious of my blood soaked shirt, it’s fine you’ll get over it.
The great Helen Gint once said,” I see the hypocrisy’s in life, but it would be a far greater hypocrisy not to participate in them.”
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